Wednesday, February 01, 2006



1). Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on theOpen Desktop."
Customer "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer "No."
Tech Support:: "Ok, si r. Can you tell me what youhave done up untilthis point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and Iwrote 'click'."

2) Customer: "I received the software update yousent, but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support:: "Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"

3).Customer:: "I'm having trouble installingMicrosoft Word."
Tech Support:: "Tell me what you've done."
Customer: "I typed 'A:SETUP'."!
Tech Support:: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer:: "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore andRecovery disk'."
Tech Support:: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer:: "What?
"Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."

4).Customer:: "Do I need a computer to use yoursoftware?"
Tech Support:: ?!%#$

5).Tech Support:: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,canyou see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen fromthere?"

6) Tech Support:: "What type of computer do youhave?"
Customer:: "A white one."

7). Tech Support:: "Type 'A:' at the prompt."
Customer:: "How do you spell that?"

8). Tech Support: "What's on your screen right now?"
Customer: "A stuffed animal that my boyfriend got me at the grocery store."

9). Tech Support:: "What operating system are yourunning?"
Customer: "Pentium."

10). Customer: "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."

11).Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder."

12).Customer: "How do I print my voicemail?"

13). Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print document, but the computer won't boot properly.
"Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-systemdisk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there' s an Intel inside."

14). Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's aproblem. We're open 24 hours."
Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"

15). Tech Support:: "What does the screen say now?"
Customer: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support:: "Well?"
Customer: "How do I know when it's ready?"

16). A plain computer illeterate guy rings techsupport to report that his computer is faulty.
Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startupfiles.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to re place it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed tochange the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.

10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.

Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell ourcustomers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the endof the CONFIG.SYS. Letme know how it goes.

10 minutes later.

User: It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come withNOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patchthat will give you ! the file. Let me know how it goes.

1 hour later.

User: I need a new power supply.
Tech: How did you come to that conclusion?
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about whatyou said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE


Ram said...

Infact these kinda craps are true, some of my frenz working in call centres really face dumbass ppl like these

வேதா said...

well my bro had been in call centre for some time, he used to get some of these kind of calls

RandomThoughts said...

Call centre jobs can infact be taxing mentally.

Made good reading.


Ajay said...

hehe nice one.........
good post...
keep posting such stuff

unknown said...

got this forward th'gh mail........really funny....enjoyed a lot...

வேதா said...

i used to lot of stuff like this and "yaam petra inbam peruga intha vaiyagam" and so i post these stuff.

smiley said...

Hi, thanks for visiting my site. good reading. Maybe I can link it to my next blog.

shobhna said...

this is too good... :))

ada-paavi!!!! said...

nice post, this reminds me bout some of the customers my frnds handeled while workig i a call center

Delhi_tamilan said...

i really enjoyed this one, with your permission (well did u agree), i'm copying it and posting it in my blog, OK.

Anonymous said...

this shit was g00d on my cellphone i was kinda bored so i looked at this crap